Tag Archives: healing

Day 15 —  Psilocybin + Psilocybe 

The Festival of Grief has been subdued again this year which is surely a positive sign. Healing perhaps has arrived. The text is a compilation / reinterpretation / reworking of many people’s descriptions of what taking psilocybin felt like for them. I found the content both online in various forums & chats as well as in my printed books.

The Poetic Factoid is borderline abuse.

[Disclaimer: As with yesterday’s entry, this poem was written on the correct day (Wednesday) but was unable to get it online owing to painting, meetings, & other exhaustions.]

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Psilocybin 

you say it feels like : you’re losing your sense of self : shedding it : that it blows your mind : puts all things into perspective : clears your thinking : connects you with the universe : expands who you are : what you know : what you could be : unravels obstacles & obstructions : achieve transcendental introspection : omniscient understanding of self : the most profound lesson you learn is : how : to be your true pure self

you say it : reduces social anxiety : helps overcome severe trauma, PTSD, & extreme depression : the trauma of growing up in an evangelical church : kept you clean from cocaine & heroin for 15 years : your self loathing’s disappeared : losing your inner hate was a miracle : freed you of so much baggage : got your life back on track : become more focused, more functional : removed your mum’s end of life pain

you are kinder, more considerate, patient, peaceful : you are growing old with grace : with more joy : delight : you feel compassion for everything in existence : find every moment fascinating : see the complex synchronicity : hear for the first time : the beautiful song of the cosmos 

shows you there is infinitely more than meets the eye : allows you to look at everything in a new light : teaches perspective : to live life in such a way : it allows you to reach the highest state of consciousness possible : to achieve that infinite goal of divinity : death no longer scares : death is simply a new beginning of something ended 

formerly you were : a dry river bed : now feel full & flowing : you are the universe : & the universe is you : the stars rush towards you : swallow you up : you travel back in time : to the Big Bang : you are the Big Bang : you are everything : you talk to God : you sit with Buddha under the bodhi tree : you walk with Jesus on a beach : you speak to dead relatives 

all i seek : is three minutes : with my beautiful babies : to know you’re all okay

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Day 15 Factoid – Sometimes Names Can Be Unkind 

Psilocybe (genus name)

relatively modern word
coined in the 1950s
using modern Latin
from the Greek psilos 
meaning bald
& kubē meaning head

not quite sure 
how i feel about this

Day 21 – Taking a Stone Away

I’ve played with a couple of ideas today, but none have truly impressed me. So I’m just going to go with this one. The poem pretty much tells its own story.

NOTE: This is the first poem of the month not inspired by a book (I think after scouring dozens of books for inspiration for the past 21 days, I’m temporarily over them. To be honest, I’ve hardly read anything for pleasure this month, which is quite sad).

This game is called Song Title (so not that much different really 🙂 )

Stone Heart

side 1: a heart
ever since the resumed after
twenty years love affair failed
before it began — a stone
has sat on my heart ; despite

all your claims of missed love ;
soul mates separated ; being one
that got away & comparing
me to every lover since — none

of that meant anything once
you arrived — & so for two long
sad years , i couldn’t bear
listening to the band you said

we would dance to when married

side 2: break
no more death defying acts to please
you as you laughed from the stalls —
you delighted in making our love
crash & burn in the middle of main

street — so everyone soon knew
what a grizzly bear you were not
the wonder i’d sold them — so ,
i drank a little whiskey — & sure ,

whenever i wonder wherever you are
my heart beats slow — other things
slow my broken heart too — but
take my word for it — at long last

i have been able to get home

boat CROP

April 18 – Day Eighteen: Easter ghosts

I saved a bunch of articles I was planning to use/explore in poetic form during NaPoWriMo. Yet almost every day, something more “personal” gets in the way.  Good Friday (the day this was written, was one of them.)  This poem was written in the car on the drive between Adelaide & my parents’ farm.

When I re-read the poem for the first time since posting it on fb almost a week ago, the irony is, the poem itself has a huge hole. The one thing I always think about at Easter is not including, other than through indirect allusions.  Maybe it works, maybe it needs to be addressed in May, when NaPoWriMo is over & the editing process can begin on all these half begun, half completed poetical sketches.  I want to tweak it even now, but will save that for later & repost as first put onto fb.


What I think of when I think of Easter

Looking over the litany of Easters past
I recall very few moments of chocolates & egg hunts 
Haunted by decades of bright eyed moons

Floating down houseboat rivers, discovering cunnilingus
Climbing cliffs, faking falls, tomato sauce for blood
Church surfing with fish laughing at services
Glorious joyous days before he finally died
Driving overnight interstate thinking I was driving to true love
Some lost at the bottom of a bottle
Crashing cars in suburban streets
Several lazy long weekends at the farm
Amusing my nieces, annoying the rest
Walking with a black dog, before meeting my souldog

Tonight the moon’s a ruddy oblong egg
Low, ghosting the hills, as I drive north
What is life but a succession of wounds
Public crucifixions, little deaths, lying in darkness
Trapped beyond stone, & eventually rising to do it all again

What pains me are the holes
Years I can’t remember – when I’m the only constant
No other person or thing to act as yardstick
& the holes

Lovers lost, friends forgotten, children never held

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blood_moon_by_darkriderdlmc-d4rzhrg

Image: Dark Moon by darkriderdlmc @ deviantart.com