Day 03 – first fungi + lightning strikes

Paleo evidence of fungi is naturally limited, their bodies being soft & squishy & such. But some lifeforms have been found frozen in rock. This is about them, the Adams & Eves of the fungi family, well not tree, but you get what I mean.

*****

Prototaxites

imagine a quiet landscape : strange &
surreal to our cellulose-centric : eyes : 
400 million years past : before flowers : 
before forests : & long : before dinosaurs

most plants barely : tickling ankles : no 
trees : no reptiles : no shade : probably 
even very little sound : nothing for 
the wind to whisper wispily through

but rising from the ground : grand 
pillars : things : neither of stone :
nor wood : taller than a typical house
vertical structures : fingers pointing

while mammals still swam : the primordial ocean
this potential precursor to fungi : is king

*Scientists debate what Prototaxites actually was: a giant fungus, a lichen-like 
organism, or a completely extinct branch of life with no modern descendants. 
But let’s not let mere quibbles stand in the way of a nice sonnet.

*****

Factoid 3 – Lightning can speed up mushroom growth & potentially double production  

mycelia celebrations

lightning strikes
mushrooms multiply

mycologists  myco
philes  &  mycophagists

celebrate thunder 
dance in storms

Day 02 – hyphens for + sizes of

When people think of fungi they probably don’t appreciate all that they do on our earth. Mushrooms (sometimes magic), toadstools & causing food to rot probably the main contenders. I want to take a moment to offer a playful hyphenated version of some (probably not even all) of the extraordinary things fungi is capable of based on my research over the years.

*Poems were written yesterday but too tired to upload before midnight. Fell asleep in computer chair.

[NB The main poem is first & last lines only]

*****

fun-gi (a hyphenated exploration)

so much more than mere mushrooms, they are — 

dark-dwellers : moistness-lovers : rock-eaters : soil-makers : space-survivors : vision-inducers : mind-benders : medicine-makers : animal behaviour-manipulators : rain-generators : zombie-fiers

menu-adorners : food-producers : cheese-ripeners : grain-brewers : fruit-fermenters : bread-risers

influencers : of every aspect of the living Earth

*****

Factoid 2 – micro to macro

size really does matter

from single-celled, microscopic
beer-brewing yeast

to one massive multicellular
Armillaria ostoyae Oregon organism 

weighing 100s of tonnes & estimated 
to be at least 2 millennia old

it’s lovingly nicknamed 
the Humongous Fungus

(the beer yeast meanwhile is known
simply                           as Jeff)

Day 01 – names & nomenclature 

April. Always after March. Every damn year. So soon in the season too. Thus Na/GloPoWriMo 2026. 

Spent yesterday being super organised & preparing for a whole other theme … but this idea has been roiling around in the back of my mind for some years. And so — a 20th hour decision meant tossing all that work out & going with my gut.

This year’s themes-based approach means I seek to write 30 poems about mushroom & fungi. (Things I love; have [read/possess] multiple books about; & am truly fascinated by.)

Sometimes the poem might be about mushrooms themselves, searching for them in the forests, recipes, their role in nature, literature, whatever. Othertimes I might take one of the many unusual exotic names as a title & riff off that on a totally unrelated tangent with only the name as common denominator. 

As previously III, since many journals/comps/etc refuse to accept poems even if they’ve only been on personal Facebook pages or blogs with minimal subscribers I won’t be posting the entirety of each poem on my blog, but a [hopefully] tantalising snippet.

I’m uncertain yet whether I shall undertake to write a daily Poetic Factoid poem. Feels like there’s a lot on this month already! Even these short silly poems often work quite well, better than the main event sometimes. Perhaps I should just write these & bugger the serious bunk.

*****

Day 1 – the many fine names of the mushroom

Button : Oyster : Honey : Chestnut : Cauliflower
Coral : Lobster : Puffball : Giant Puffball : Parasol 
Milky : Straw : Deer : Beech : Elm

Wine Cap : Stinkhorn Inky Cap : Black Trumpet
Hedgehog : Chicken of the Woods
Lion’s Mane : Turkey Tail
Wood Ears, Jelly Ears, & Pig’s Ears

Slippery Jack : Jack O’Lantern : Charcoal Burner
Yellowfoot : Yellow Stainer : Velvet Shank

Dryad’s Saddle : Elfin Saddle : Scarlet Elf Cup
Saffron Milk Cap : Indigo Milk Cap : 
Panther Cap : Death Cap : Tiger Sawgill : Destroying Angel

Fairy Ring : Earthstar

Chanterelle & False Chanterelle
Morel & False Morel

a list just begun : a list of poetics : & poison 
                               divination : & deception 
                               delicious : & disgusting
magic : & medicinal 
decay : & rebirth 

a list : as old : as humanity 

*****

Factoid 1 – genetic mind warp

the categorisation of mushrooms

neither plants : nor animals they
belong instead : to the kingdom : fungi
along with : lichens, yeasts, mildews, molds, rusts, & smuts

indeed, we’re more closely related to fungi than plants
sharing some 50% of our DNA with shrooms

Day 30 — Ann[e] + choices

April is always a challenging month. After a dozen of these NaPoWriMos I think I’m starting to get the hang of it. That said, still incredibly draining churning out X poems a day (even when you’re only working a half day like today). You feel good when you get to the end. You feel better in a fortnight when you reread what you created & realise a lot of it is actually pretty cool. That said said, this year was also perhaps the easiest because of the subject matter. I really love books. I really love reading. And I really loved this assignment. 

She’s already been mentioned 3 times in other poems this month so it won’t be a surprise to read her name because it was at once tough & not that tough to choose. Sure, there might be other books I’ve probably read more often: Tolkien, The Belgariad, Harry Potter, A Christmas Carol, Pride & Prejudice, Bill Bryson’s Shakespeare &/or The English Language, or Blake’s Songs of Innocence, etc — but there’s something about the Green Gables Anne that just sticks. She’s always getting into trouble, but her charm always gets her out of it. Been planning to end with it for several weeks so lines have been popping in & out for days. It was fun to work on. And yes I reread key scenes & yes I cried like a bub-bub just as I have done for over 40 years.

The closing Factoid however I wasn’t sure what to do for that, until it just arrived. Like a full stop at the end of a sentence; a finis at the close of a play.

*****

Anne with an E

*****

Day 30 Factoid — Personal Factoid

life choices

of all the multitude 
of glorious things
one chooses to do in life 

so not just breathing 
or eating or sleeping
all kind of compulsory

without question i’ve 
— even more than write —
chosen to read books

day in day out
across decades
a reading life

Day 29 — dirty books + factoid couplets

Almost every poem this month to date has been, in essence, a love poem. To books. To reading. To reading books. This one, breaks that pattern.

The Poetic Factoid is actually a series of Hypertext Factoids with Bactoids — It’s a poem where every line has a hypertext link to verify its claim. About why Reading is good for you. (A familiar theme true, but these are more of the facts I’ve collected along the way as I research. Originally they were just gonna be the text from the articles, but then I realise a couple of them rhymed; then I made the rest do so as well. It was fun.)

*****

dirty books

do alarm me : a little : i sometimes think : who held this before me : & worse : what did they hold as they held this book : various things have been  ::  in  ::  second hand books i’ve bought : & i don’t just mean : abandoned bookmarks : & forgotten pressed flowers : but other things : have been caught : like muffin crumbs : jam smears : peanut butter blotches : is that tomato sauce : have you been eating Cheezels : or Mac’n’Cheese : squashed mosquitoes : & miscellaneous other bugs : can now tell the difference : i believe : between coffee plops & tea drops : wait is that blood : no i don’t want to know  ::  & sometimes : i think even worse : the things i cannot see : are actually the curse : like getting medical & technical for a sec :  what if the previous reader was sick : germs bacteria fungi microbes : how many of them are still hanging around : did the previous reader : wash their hands : not just after gardening : or emptying the bin : please tell me : i’m not holding microscopic : drips of pee : or for that matter //

// look it doesn’t matter : i think i’ll put the book down : just for a bit : while i go & take  ::  some time out

*****

Day 29 Factoid Overload — Hypertext Factoids with Bactoids

reading …

reduces stress
aids academic success

boosts brain connectivity
improves your memory

more than one book at a time challenges & improves cognitive flexibility
can be used as a form of therapy

expands your vocabulary
develops empathy

gives your brain a comprehensive workout
causes new neural pathways to sprout

improves concentration a heap
before bed gives a better night’s sleep

to kids supercharges early language acquisition
whereas kids reading to dogs improves their own condition

makes you kinder
protects you from prison (kinda)

even prolongs your life
(which ya gotta admit, is kinda nice)

Day 28 — Thursday Next + Thursday Now

Another Lawrence’s Maxim might come as a shock given I’ve been drip feeding them out on Saturdays up until now — but the truth is I quite enjoy writing them, there’s lots of books on the possible shortlist, & I’m running out of time. Three days only left of this year’s Glo/NaPoWriMo so I figured what they hey (I already have one planned for the final day & there was the special Blue Shakespeare edition Wednesday Last) …

As is often the case, the Factoid became more fun & grew in the telling to be a quirky little thing all its own.

*****

Thursday Next

*****

Day 28 Factoid — Thursdays on my mind

7 Thursday week: a Fun Factoid pome told in seven days

That may be must be, love, on Thursday next.
Paris

i.
We all know it’s named after 
Thor (Norse god of thunder)

but after that Thursday 
fun facts tend to dry up

ii.
some folks call it “Friday’s Friday” 
given it heralds Friday
& therefore hurrah!  the weekend

i prefer to think of it more 
as Wednesday’s Thursday
— but it seems less exciting

iii. 
Thanksgiving (a local US custom) 
is always celebrated on November’s 
fourth Thursday

er, iv.
the chemical element Thorium (Th) 
is named after Thor, which means
it’s indirectly connected to Thursday

v.
Richard Osman’s now making tons 
of money after choosing Thursday 
as the day his Murder Club meets

vi.
Thursday is mentioned more times
in Shakespeare than any other day

17 including the phrase “Thursday Next”
uttered by three separate characters:
Paris, Capulet, & Friar Maximillian Laurence (no relation)

vii. 
come this Thursday next
i won’t have to crank out 
three poems daily & can 
                                      finally rest

Day 27 — book sense part 1 + book sense part 5

Been in my head (my nose mainly) for a while. A simple poem about a much beloved part of bookerying. The Poetic Factoid is in fact, a Negative Factoid.

*****

bibliosmia 

as books age
they begin to break down
the paper breaks down
the ink breaks down
the cloth breaks down
the leather breaks down
the binding breaks down

what break down means
in this situation
is delicious little bits 
of book bit
drift off into the air
& into our noses

these exquisite scents
are special fragrances
capable of forming
spiritual connections
within our brains 
primarily because
i have it on good
authority that — 
old book shops are 
exactly what
heaven smells like

if i could bottle it
& make it a cologne
1. i’d wear it every day
2. i’d make a mint
cos all bibliophiles
love the smell of books

*****

Day 27 Factoids — thankfully not a word

bibliovore

while we bibliophiles
adore almost everything 
to with books
the way they look
the way they feel
the way they sound
the way they smell
(sweet angels above —
that sublime scent)

thankfully we don’t
get off on eating them

Day 26 — Robin Hood + Will Scarlet 

Today’s poem was always on the shortlist but at the last minute supplanted another book I was considering writing about. It came about given how I spent part of my afternoon — underneath an oak glade as the afternoon sun set. It seemed quite obvious to flip out that other book for this one — or these ones — as there’s no definitive text & multiple versions of the wonderful tales of the Merry Men of Robin Hood. The Factoid is likewise connected to that medieval gang.

*****

LM #05 — Robin Hood

*****

Day 26 Factoid — coiffures in the Greenwood 

Will Scarlet and the Hairdresser 

in the earliest ballads 
Will Scarlet was but 
a background character

called Will Scathlock
Middle English sc(e)afan  “to shave” 
& locc meaning “hair” 

in other words 
Will Scarlet was originally
a skinhead

Day 25 — poets + soldiers

The theme of “reading” overlayed on “Anzac Day” works well. (Particularly poetry.)
The Poetic Factoid poem kinda explains the rationale behind today’s main poem.

*****

The Boy From Eden Valley 
by g.r. “ukelele” jones

There was stillness in the trenches, for the word had passed along 
That the call to take Lone Pine had been made,
And even though they’d tried before & all knew it to be wrong
Orders from the top couldn’t be belayed.
All the tired mud-coated soldiers from units near and far
Had gathered one by one across the line,
For though the boys would much prefer to stay where they are,
No body was willing to be left behind.

There was old Harrison, now a long way from a pup,
An old man with white snow dusting all his hair;
But few could fight beside him when his blood was fairly up
He would go wherever his countrymen would dare.
Clancy of the Overflow too had volunteered to serve,
No better rifleman ever held a gun;
For no man would ever say that Clancy had no nerve,
He learnt to shoot under the hot Australian sun.

And one was there, a youngster who’d lied about his age,
He was scrawny like a chicken undersized,
But oftentimes there’s a touch of angry eagle – impossible to gauge
And as such unexpected heroes are disguised.
He was hard and tough and wiry – just the sort that won’t say die
There was courage in his quick impatient tread;
And he bore the badge of gameness in his bright and fiery eye,
And the proud and lofty carriage of his head.

But still so young and weedy, one would doubt his power to stay,
And the captain said, “Sorry, son you’ll never do
For a dash cross no man’s land, you’d better stop away,
That wasteland is far too dangerous for you.”
So he waited sad and wistful – only Clancy stood his friend
“I think we ought to let him come,” he said;
“I warrant he’ll be there with us when we all reach the end,
For he is from the hills and is Barossa bred.

“He hails from Eden Valley, up by Kaiserstuhl’s side,
Where the hills are twice as steep and twice as rough,
Where a horse’s hoofs strike firelight from the flint stones every stride,
The man that holds his own there is more good enough.
And the Eden Valley cobber is a special kind of tough,
Where the dry creek runs those granite hills between;
Outwardly gruff maybe, but inside the right sort of stuff,
And nowhere yet such comrades have I seen.”

Although he did not understand the reason for this tussle, 
World politics was low priority back on the North Rhine, 
The boy from Eden Valley stood stock still not moving a muscle – 
Thinking: I intend to make the Lonesome Pine mine
Through the stringybarks and saplings, on the rough and broken ground, 
Up the hillside at a furious pace he went; 
Promising not to lower his rifle till he arrived safe and sound, 
Working his way up that tricky ascent.

He was right among his mates as they pushed up the sloping hill, 
While bodies all around dropped like flies, 
A blind fierce fever overcame him propelling his legs still,
He wanted none to see the terror in his eyes. 
Then they lost him for a moment, where two gullies met 
While he was ten thousand miles away remembering  
Dim distant hillsides where the vines would not be budding yet, 
Where all in Eden Valley were waiting for spring.

A season he would never see again, nor turn his head for home
Alone and unassisted he’d not be coming back. 
For two bullets pierced his chest, the holes gaped with bloody foam. 
And like a wounded bull he fell upon the track, 
And the bugles all did blare retreat, not that many heard, 
Blood and bone from man & boy covered now the spur; 
Dead and wounded strew the ground, cries for help were slurred, 
And in the dust his vision began to blur.

Now down by Gallipoli, where the pine-clad ridges rise 
Their torn and rugged battlements on high, 
Where the air is clear as crystal, and the white sun burns your eyes 
At grey dawn in the cold and frosty sky, 
And below The Nek where the Aegean does sweep and sway 
From Homer’s winedark sea the miles are far and wide, 
The man from Eden Valley is a household name today, 
But we still lament that damned stupidity, the reason that he died.


*****

Day 25 Factoid — Banjo was a soldier & a poet

poet soldiers

i.
Banjo was a popular poet
who for twenty years prior
romanticised bush life
representing those
“outback” as tough
independent  heroic
yet  laconic underdogs
qualities many soldiers 
wanted to reflect

A&R published his poems 
in pocket editions designed 
to fit in Anzac tunic pockets
the perfect gift for 1917s 
cultured ‘man in the trench’
poems like Mulga Bill’s Bicycle 
The Man From Snowy River 
were read &/or recited 
by the diggers to sustain 
their spirits with “feelgood” 
humorous yarns from home

ii.
i don’t buy the bullshit 
WWI & those who fought 
forged our modern Aussie DNA
on those fabled battlefields
but i wholeheartedly believe 
they gave their naivety
& their innocence 
                                      for country
some gave their bodies, 
some their minds; many their lives; 
but all had their optimism 
their gungho patriotism 
brutally crushed by tanks
blown apart by artillery 
ripped into shreds by shrapnel 
strafed by machinegun fire
choked by poison gas
decimated & dismayed 
by the scale of carnage
inhuman conditions & 
idiotic leadership 
from too many 
in positions of power

& as such deserve our care
& eternal compassion

Day 24 — 2024 ten star reads + worst book titles

It’s been a long day. I’ve worked on several poems none of which have made it to completion, hence it’s time for a couple of quick filler pomes. No 1: A poem made up of the titles only of all the books I read which I gave 10 stars to in 2024. (Only 10 of them.) That’s it. No editing or tweaking allowed. That’s it. That’s the exercise. The task in 2 months time is to come along & edit that skeleton pome & see if it can be brought to more/some sense.

No 2: The Factoid is very similarly created. I have chosen 13 of the worst titles ever as voted by Good Reads … & I can concur. Some are pretty shite. Tried to arrange them in at least a pseudo-pome format.

*****

2024 : ***** *****

The Wood, The Running Hare:
The Secret Life of Farmland
Raising Hare, Under the Stars

The Long Way to a Small Angry Planet
The Galaxy, and the Ground Within
The House in the Cerulean Sea

This Changes Everything
Maybe Next Time
This Changes Everything

*****

Day 24 Factoid — 13 of the worst book titles ever

Why Geese Don’t Get Obese

Truth, Dare, or Handcuffs or Threeway
Smashed, Squashed, Splattered, Chewed, Chunked and Spewed

How to Poo at Work
How to Shit in the Woods: An Environmentally Sound Approach to a Lost Art
Walter The Farting Dog Farts Again

It’s Not That I’m Bitter . . .: Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying About Visible Panty Lines and Conquered the World
How to Raise Your I.Q. by Eating Gifted Children
Sweet Jesus, I Hate Bill O’Reilly

Porn Again Christian
Birth Control is Sinful in the Christian Marriages and also Robbing God of Priesthood Children!!
Anybody Can Be Cool . . . But Awesome Takes Practice

Abraham Lincoln: Fuck Lord of the Moon (Presidential Fuck Machine, #3)
Uncockblockable